Yes we did!

It's a beautiful moment on a beautiful night. I'm so happy for America and so, so proud. I'm so happy for our children, and I have more hope and confidence in our futures than I ever have before.

I'm excited to open the gates to a new order, a new philosophy, and a better way.

Catharsis by infomercial

It's no secret I'm on the left side of the fence. That aside, I believe that like many of us, I'm fairly objective and savvy when it comes to political spin and bull. It's loud, clear, and pretty obvious from both sides - c'mon it's politics. Duh. And with that, I was a little bit hesitant about Obama's network time tonight. I wondered if it would be too over the top, too glitzy, or preachy.

I started to watch it carefully, but by the middle of it, I was in tears. More than tears - I was on the edge of the couch, sobbing. I realize that a good movie can do this too, of course, and I also know that this was a smartly put together piece - but it simply transcended that. In each of the people highlighted, I could see myself and my family both now and in the future. It was wonderful and worrisome. It was an excellent argument, and most importantly, a positive and uniting one. It made me feel American. I can only speak for myself of course, but I do think that a generation of us have trouble feeling patriotic, and quite honestly, could care less about petty implications and politics of the past. Our conduct in the world has been an embarrassment over the past eight years, and our image is terribly broken. As a friend of mine mentioned, it seems like willful ignorance is taking over. Not only that, but we've been warned that we are the first generation that won't do better than our parents - in fact, to do as well as they have will be a long shot.

I believe that the dream is broken, and I've been bitter and disenchanted about America and my family's future. It's quite a feat to make me feel patriotic and hopeful, and Obama does that. I believe that's a crucial component in uniting us. This election strikes me as a turning point - a generational stand to say STOP this bullshit, people, and get back to humanity and dignity and supporting working people. No one has been more divisive, juvenile, and negative than the Republican campaign and the right - and what's worse is that many of them do it in the name of patriotism, some in the name of fear and race, and most disturbing, in the name of God. It's frustrating, sad, and at times, downright nauseating.

I'm on the left because I cannot understand why health care shouldn't be a birthright of every citizen; because I am sickened that 40 years of work may not support me and my husband and my friends and family in retirement; because I don't understand or accept this disastrous and wrongful war, wrong from its very conception. I don't understand how despite doing 'all the right things', so many of us still cringe when we buy groceries and heating oil. I don't understand why abortion continues to dominate politics, even though very few people (relatively speaking) will actually ever have to deal directly with the issue. I don't understand why people spout religion and patriotism over education and advancement. Education and advancement of a country and its people is true patriotism, isn't it? Questioning the deployment of troops is very patriotic - blindly following the 'wisdom' of the administration is, as evidenced by this debacle, most certainly not patriotic, and aids in fueling anti-American sentiment. I'm on the left because I don't understand how "drill baby drill" can be the mantra on anyone's tongue. I'm on the left because I don't understand why the rich shouldn't pay more taxes or why capitalism shouldn't be scrutinized. I don't understand how being a POW, albeit an honorable and extreme experience, makes you qualified to lead our country TODAY. McCain is dated, surly, and careless (evidence:Palin) and knee-jerk (you can call it maverick), and that's probably the worst combination to put out there in an unstable world.

Tuesday is the time for a complete 180 - I'm proud to have contributed to Obama's campaign and tonight I'm happy to know that some of that went toward this historic production. I have never contributed to any campaign before. I wish I could have given more - this year we've had to tighten our belts, but we didn't flinch at making a small contribution to Obama. And clearly, millions of Americans feel the same. I hope Americans will take a stand and make history on Tuesday and choose humanity and peace over war mongering and corporate greed. And if we choose McCain, then I will be convinced that half the country chose willful, shameful, and disgraceful ignorance as its mode of operation.

I'd like to end with a nod to our nutty undecideds, as beautifully crafted by the one and only David Sedaris:

"To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”

To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked."

I accept your nomination.

Ms. Chairman, Delegates, and fellow citizens:

I accept your nomination to be the next Vice President of the
United Z-Sectors of Planet 8-GS, Defender of the Galaxies.

The opposition has criticized my qualifications to be in this position and to potentially be the President. To them, I present that Governor Palin of Planet Earth has not just opened the doors for women like me, but has shot them open with her very own rifle. It is to her that I owe my unprecedented, freak rise from the PTA to the Governorship of Sector A-1. If she is deemed fit for for this position, than so am I, and so are millions and millions of organisms across our Galaxies.

Like Palin, I have multiple offspring - they are Squibb, Plank, Tearduct, Birch, and Activia. I share with her the burden of motherhood.

I too am an avid sportswoman - I never miss an opportunity to pick off fuzzy Andromeda Bears from the comfort of my spaceship.

My executive experience spans over half of my life, starting with Student Council in 9th grade, Vice President of the Sophomore Class, and President of the Junior Class. That's right...President. Like any Class President, or sector Mayor, or even President of a country, I had actual responsibilities like purchasing bunting for the Homecoming floats, and saying NO to over-the-top class expenditures like hooded sweatshirts and commemorative plaques. I ensured that our Student Government Constitution was honored by having anyone who questioned it removed from their position and socially ousted.

In college, I served on the Student Association, where I weeded out the bake sale fundraiser corruption among the good ol boys of the College Republicans club. Soon after college, I married my high school sweetheart, whose dead eyes still glaze over for me. Palin and I have much in common. I'm ready.

Once my children were part of the public space education system, I decided it needed to improve. Like Palin, I joined the PTA and cheered on the space-hockey teams. Because of my school spirit, I was catapulted to Mayor of W-18, Sector A-1. As mayor, I had about 10 more actual responsibilities. Just like in high school, I became totally popular as a Maverick, and just six years later, the 17 people of A-1 elected me to Govern their sector.

Since Governing this sector, I got a passport asap. I plan to travel to all the troubled spots in our galaxy and sort out what's going on. I'm glad my running mate's campaign still has a spaceship, as I sold Sector A-1's on SpaceAuction. I didn't think I'd need it. Plus, don't forget that I am qualified in foreign space policy because my sector is close to other foreign sectors!
You can be sure if my running mate dies in office, my advisers will implant a permanent chip in my brain so I can execute their decisions and run the United Sectors. And I'll let them do it without anesthesia. I'm tough. Bring it on.

Thank You. Thanks to ALL of You.

Excerpt from NY Times Bestseller List

for September 30, 2026



HARDCOVER NONFICTION

• I Was Right All Along, C. Ludden


• How Our Son Earned A PhD by age 18, Ludden & Ludden


• Handbag Hobags: Inside the Very Bradley Prostitution Scandal, A. Green


• 50+ and Still Getting Carded - The Beauty Guide, Green, Ludden & Partners Press

Back to the present:

I'm planning to take Sam to the Fly Creek Cider Mill sometime this fall. I told him about it tonight after booktime, and how they make apple juice and we could pick apples right from the trees. He added, "and peppers - we can pick the peppers, they are hanging on the trees! And I can eat them!"

He had peppers on his mind because I wore this necklace today - he calls the stone a pepper. He knows it's not really a pepper, but every time I wear it, he says, "That's a pepper. On your neck. I'm gonna eat it!" and he moves in and pretends to eat it.